Doing Math Together Can be the Secret Sauce to Family Bonding (Yes, Really!): Part 1

You might say that you’re not a maths person, but hold on. Read this to the end, and you’ll discover that you could be one, and it could create lifetime memories for you and your loved ones.

Let me take you down memory lane to my high school days in Nigeria. I had an older townsman who was deeply into his university studies and was a math wizard. He used to tutor my cousin and me in Math and additional math.

Little did we know that my dad was covertly monitoring our sessions. With all the stealth of a seasoned spy, he would hover near the door to catch a glimpse (and, of course, some eavesdropping) of the math madness happening inside.

One day, my dad, who was not a maths person, was clearly in awe of the complexity of our work and couldn't resist anymore. He quietly tiptoed in, gave me a subtle nudge, and with the kind of look that only parents can give, whispered, “Nnayi, come with me for a minute.” He took me aside and asked, in his classic Ngwa dialect, "Are those big words ‘Nwa Agu’ is throwing around like that, sum?" Now, to him, every math problem was a ‘sum’ or ‘arithmetic’ problem, no matter how advanced it got.

"Yes, Papa," I said, half-proud and half-nervous.

"Are you understanding all that?" he pressed.

"Yes, Papa!" I replied, feeling like a mini-math genius.

He let out a big sigh of relief, almost as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. And with a broad smile, he said, “Well done! Now, you can go back.” With that, I was allowed to return to the lessons.

And that moment? It's still etched in my heart. It’s been 26 years since my father passed, but that memory of him and the support “Nwa Agu” rendered to us are things I carry with me. Both of them, so genuinely concerned and proud, created a lifetime memory.

Now, fast-forward to today. My own family is a mix of math lovers and... well, maths avoiders. We’ve got three math enthusiasts who would happily dive into a complex calculus problem while eating dinner, two who’d rather jump out of a window than deal with a simple equation, and one who’s somewhere in the middle—baffled but curious.

Really, there’s a fun part! Even though it's hard to get everyone together all the time, when we do sit down and tackle simple maths problems together, something magical happens. The three math fans love discussing the process, breaking it down for everyone else (because, I’m telling you, maths is just more fun when you’re explaining it). The one in the middle? You should see the smile on his/her face when he/she cracks a problem. It’s like watching a lightbulb flick on. The two who are more math-averse? They seem to enjoy just being part of the conversation, whether they understand the problem or not. And honestly, that’s their form of success.

In this whole thing, for my wife and me, we get to exercise our old brains, reminiscing about school days—our maths teachers, and sharing laughs over the more advanced math courses I once coached them on during their time in the university. It's a chance for everyone to bond, just like we do when we eat together, study the Bible, pray, or chat about national and world events. These little moments—math problems included—create memories that, I believe, will last for generations.

And you know what? It doesn’t even have to be math. We delve into a wide range of topics. From grammar to history to random trivia. If it sparks a conversation, we’re there. After all, it’s not really about the subject—it’s about the connection.

So, next time you find yourself facing a “math problem” in your family, maybe give it a go. If you’re not a math person, you can even ask your children or grandchildren who are in school to come and teach you math. Who knows? It could be the start of some unforgettable memories.

What's coming next?

In Part 2, I will narrate the experiences of teaching my mother math (actually, arithmetic), and an embarrassing mistake I made while working on advanced problems with my younger sister, who was excellent in math. I will discuss the lifetime memories and nuanced lessons from those experiences.